BKaF – Brad Kovach and Friends

There are a few constants in the universe. One of these is pizza. And how awesomely good it is. Seriously, if you don’t like pizza, you don’t like the universe. Which is a pretty bad move.

But, silliness aside, pizza is one of the greatest foods ever, and I would like to share with you the recipe for darn good Neapolitan pizza. You see, the key to a good pizza is a yummy crust. With a good crust, you could use poop for topping and it would taste good. Neapolitan is a almost cracker-thin crust that’s just yummalicious, and in my opinion, it is the best of the pizza crusts.

WARNING: This recipe is a two day process, if you are lame, don’t undertake it.

To begin with, the ingredients list, which is almost too simple (By the way, there are thousands of different recipes for pizza crust, but they all basically use the same ingredients, the best book I’ve seen for pizza crust, and bread in general is The Bread Baker’s Apprentice):

You need:

4 ½ cups of flour (unbleached bread flour works best)

1 ¾ tsp. of salt

1 tsp. of instant yeast

¼ cup of olive or vegetable oil

1 ¾ cups of ice cold water

Step 1: Put all these things in a bowl, and you mix them together with either a large spoon or an electric mixer (if you were born without a work ethic).

It will look like this:

And finally this:

The dough should be slightly sticky, but not like a drunk prom date. You should be able to manipulate it without dough staying on your hands. Add water or flour as necessary.

Step 2: Chop this sucker into four equally sized chunks on a large pan (two if you like pizzas with a bit thicker crust, six if you like tiny thin ones). Then, dust each in flower, roll them into balls, and spray some oil on them.

Step 3: Cover the pan with a plastic cover of some sort. I use a garbage bag. Throw this little bundle of joy into the fridge and let it sit overnight.

Step 4: The next day, pull the pan out of the fridge 2-3 hours before you make the pizza.

Step 5: Remove each dough ball from the pan and transfer it to a floured counter top. Then, flatten each dough ball to a disc about ½ inch thick (or less, it’s not too big of a deal.) Then, cover with plastic wrap, and let it sit for the aforementioned 2-3 hours.

Step 6: If you have a baking stone of some sort, about 45 minutes from the 2-3 hour mark, heat your oven as high as it will go (most home ones go to about 550 degrees) and put the stones in while the oven is preheating. If you don’t have stones, just use a conventional pan, but don’t worry about preheating it (still heat the oven to 550 though). The cool thing about stones is that you can get the crispified bottom of the crust.

Now is a great time to chop some ingredients, and make some sauces. The cool thing about pizza is the kinds of sauces you can use, pink sauce, white sauce, red sauce, whatever. I like a red sauce seasoned with basil, garlic, oregano, rosemary, parsley and thyme.

For toppings, use veggies, they taste really good. Stay away from most red meat, it makes a ton of grease, and takes away from the crust. Use chicken. Two or three ingredients (including cheese) are good for each one. My favorites are jalapeño peppers, red bell peppers, diced tomatoes, chicken, mozzarella cheese, parmesan cheese, and cheddar cheese. Put your favorites.

CARDINAL RULE: Less is more! Don’t slather on the cheese, sauce, or any other topping. It doesn’t enhance the taste, just makes the pizza less structurally stable.

Step 7: Toss your crusts. Dust your hands with flour. If you want to do it cool-man-style like me, bounce each crust across your knuckles in a circular motion, then throw it up in the air until you reach the desired size. Or you can just flatten it out with your hands. Make sure you have a device to transfer it to your hot stone (if you’re using one).

Step 8: Throw on all your ingredients (less is more, sauce thickens when it gets cooked), and use a brush to brush melted butter on the crust for added crispy. Slide this bad boy into the oven.

Step 9: Pull it out, and devour.

I hope you enjoy this epic recipe, and come back next week for a doozy: PB and J sandwiches!

-Tom

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3 Responses to “Cooking with Thomas – Pizza!”

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